Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I think I sprained my soul last night
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Randomize
