That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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