He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize