True but thats because hes a fetus.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
