Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
