My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
