There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
