; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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