if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
