Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
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