The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
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Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
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Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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