Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
