That's intense
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
