Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
