I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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