is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
