I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
