i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
