TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Randomize