Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
