I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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