He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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