he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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