I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize