My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
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The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
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Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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