Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
If I had your ass I would rule the world
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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