U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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