Who wears a wallet chain?!
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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