and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
