...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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