he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
3pm strippers are depressing
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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