Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
