i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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