I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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