If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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