everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
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