I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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