she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
