Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
