I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
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