doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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