She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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