and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize