Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
