I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
