I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize