I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
God, I missed his penis.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
