Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize
