And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now understand why vodka
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize