My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
